Eat Me Daily reports that Food + Sex, a new magazine (bottom) with claims to be "The New Aesthetic of Food" featuring articles about human-incubated yogurt and "Tripping Balls on the Magic Penis" about eating psychedelic mushrooms, has debuted.

Sounds like the culmination of food porn.

For those who want more than titillation, The Enthusiast reports on how it’s done:

That mouth-watering Dominos pizza pull-apart, the tumbling ice cube dive-bombing into a perfect splash of soft drink — hell, even Whiskas looks pretty damn tasty when it’s artfully forked apart on TV commercials. Just who is responsible for these flirtatious parades of food pornography?

Welcome to the unspoken world of food stylists, a niche industry responsible for producing attractive food and drink footage of almost otherworldly beauty. This critical weapon is vital in convincing you to purchase that greasy burger, which otherwise looks like a flaccid afterthought by a distracted teenage fry cook.

Robert Carmack, an Australian food stylist of 20 years experience., says, there’s a simple code of conduct when it comes to advertising the product with some honesty. “We use the actual product when we’re selling that product. I’m free to use anything else when it’s an auxiliary. In other words, selling cereal means I must use the actual corn flakes, but the sugar and milk – or white-coloured glue – can be faked.” Mmm, we always did love the taste of Clag as kids!

Robert notes that many food stylists begin their life at gourmet publications, which usually involve proving your worth with mottled lighting and suspiciously realistic props. You’ll work your way up the (ahem) food chain, to photographing products like Big Macs against white Formica without any props at all, but still generating the same appeal to appetite.

In the age of Photoshop, however, everything is usually graphically manipulated after the final shot. “It tends to make stylists lazy when it comes to wiping out marks and drops, but it’s essential,” laments Robert.

Manhattan feels markedly different this fall. Returning to campus, I’ve seen Doug’s “How to avoid H1N1 and seasonal flu” in every bathroom in the veterinary medicine buildings. Everyone’s whispering about H1N1 and many preventative methods have been put in place to keep the flu at bay. At St. Isidore’s Catholic Church, they’ve even gone as far as to discontinue communion wine for the congregation. Chaplain Fr Keith Weber says that the decision was made by the staff and not mandated by the diocese. Will it be mandatory in the future?

Drinking the communion wine always felt like a bit of Russian roulette for me. How healthy was the person who drank before me? During the winter when the whole church was coughing and hacking, I decided to skip it entirely. I had accepted the fact that this public health nightmare would continue indefinitely. St. Isidore’s new policy of discontinuing communion wine is definitely a smart move to join the “avoid H1N1” campaign.

The policy for distributing communion wafers has always been to wash your hands before the service starts, but now there is also a bottle of antibacterial available to use immediately before giving out communion. St. Isidore’s is just one of many churches around the country (and globally) implementing these anti-flu strategies. The virus once known as swine flu has affected the practices of Christians and Muslims, especially in Great Britain.

The archbishops of Canterbury and York said the church's worship needed to "take into account the interests of public health during the current phase of the swine flu pandemic."

The Muslim Council of Britain has released guidelines to Muslims urging imams and mosque committee members to increase the awareness among the Muslim community about the dangers of using communal towels during cleansing ceremonies before worship.

As far as working against H1N1, it’s a good step in the right direction. Even once the pandemic has blown over, shouldn’t these practices stay in place to prevent future diseases?

The bites/barfblog French team of correspondent Albert Amgar and Manhattan (Kansas) translators Abby Herald and Amy Hubbell have provided news of the latest E. coli related recall from France, this time in Carrefour Discount Frozen Hamburger Patties (right).

Product recalled by: Carrefour

Department: Food and Drinks

Brand: Carrefour

Product: Lot Number/Serial Number: The aim of this recall is for lot number IE 565 EC with a “best by” date of August 5th, 2010.

Reason for recall: Discovery of contamination by the E.coli bacteria

Recommendation: Consumers having bought this product are asked not to consume it.

Place of recall: Consumers who have purchased the product are asked to bring it back to the store where they will be reimbursed.

Additional information: Carrefour states that they have received no consumer complaints. According to the distributer this bacteria is destroyed at a temperature of 65° C (149° F) and the hamburgers are of no risk if they have been thoroughly cooked. The products related to this recall have been removed from Carrefour, Carrefour Market and Champion stores.

Consumer Hotline: For more information, call the toll free hotline 0 805 90 80 70

Again, the recommended cooking temperature seems low, and it’s really risky to say there’s no-risk with any product. Cross-contamination in any food preparation area is a huge issue. That’s why everyone tries to get the pathogens out, rather than blaming the cook.
 

Stephen Colbert’s fear of bears – usually listed as the biggest threat to America in his Threat Down segment – has made it to the blogsphere.

I’ve made it a point to say in my talks lately, when I talk about food safety, I’m talking about food that doesn’t make people barf. Food safety means lots of things to lots of people, but I’m focused on the microbes that sicken up to 30 per cent of all citizens of all countries every year (that’s what the World Health Organization says).

“If you plan on venturing into the wilderness on a camping or hiking trip, you need to be prepared to deal with potentially dangerous wildlife. Bears in particular need to be respected and avoided. One of the easiest ways to avoid bears is to be careful with storing and preparing food.”

It’s not just Colbert. On a family trip when I was, oh, about 13-years-old, we spent a couple of nights in Banff, Alberta, and were visited by a bear that emptied the cooler.

"Be aware of the necessary food storage and cooking precautions while camping. Do everything you can to keep food odors away from your camp. Taking these precautions is the easiest way to prevent a bear encounter."

So respect the bears (especially in the video below, which involves Canadians, kids, hockey and bears).

It’s food safety month in September, so expect to hear lots of sanctimonious statements about how simple food safety is if only the people would do things the right way.

But what’s the right way?

Food safety is not simple.

Anyone who says so is full of it.

And any food safety nerd knows there are major disagreements about all levels of food safety minutia.

Eating Well magazine asked 10 questions of some food safety types earlier this year and a bunch of stories are now on-line.. The differences in the answers reveal how un-simple food safety is, and how different people talk with journalists.

The Eating Well piece poses some questions, but doesn’t address the hard ones: Who is an expert (a word I hate)? Who is competent to offer advice about anything? Who am I to answer anything, to offer an opinion?

At bites.ksu.edu and barfblog.com, we actually have a policy on how to answer questions, how we provide advice, and it’s being updated.

The magazine has its 10 commandments of food safety, but like fallen angels, commandments are open to interpretation. Judge for yourselves.

Your contestants are:

Ming Tsai, owner, Blue Ginger, his award-wining East-meets-West restaurant in Wellesley Massachusetts.

Bill Marler, managing partner and personal injury lawyer at Marler Clark.

Linda Kender, an associate professor in the College of Culinary Arts at Johnson & Wales University in Providence, R.I.

Richard Vergili, a professor in hospitality management at The Culinary Institute of America (CIA)

Catherine Donnelly, a professor of nutrition and food science at the University of Vermont.

Donna Rosenbaum, co-founder and executive director of Safe Tables Our Priority (S.T.O.P.).

Marion Nestle, professor in the Department of Nutrition, Food Studies, and Public Health at New York University.

Scott Donnelly, a product safety authority with more than two decades of food industry experience.

Douglas Powell, Ph.D, associate professor, food safety, Kansas State University.

Try to distinguish the wordy from the brief, the fact-based and the faith-based approaches to food safety. Match up the bios with the responses and spot the hypocricy.

Eating Well asked, do you always:

1. Use a “refrigerator thermometer” to keep your food stored at a safe temperature (below 40°F).

Tsai: At Blue Ginger, yes, and [a thermometer] is built in the Sub-Zero fridges we use at home.
Marler: Yes.
Kender: I check the temperature of my refrigerator once a week, especially during the summer months.
Vergili: Yes, unless I plan to use the food within a couple of hours.
Donnelly: Yes. I consider my refrigerator to be my most important food-safety device. Knowing the temperature of the refrigerator you use to store food is critical to keep food safe. Many refrigerators in the U.S. operate at unsafe temperatures, and the warmer foods are stored, the more quickly bacteria, including pathogens, can grow.
Rosenbaum: Yes. Appliance thermometers are easy to find in hardware stores. I recommend using one in the freezer as well. It is especially important to check the internal temperatures of secondary refrigerators/freezers kept in basements, garages or other places of more extreme room temperature.
Nestle: No. I live in a tiny apartment in New York and have a small refrigerator. Nothing stays in it that long.
Donnelly: No.
Powell: Fridges fluctuate and thermometers are the only way to acquire accurate data.

2. Defrost food in the refrigerator, the microwave or in cold water, never on the counter.

Tsai  Yes.
Marler: Yes.
Kender: Mostly I defrost in the refrigerator, but there have been occasions that I had to resort to the cold running water method.
Vergili: No, I will occasionally let something begin to defrost on the counter when I am home. For example, today I had some frozen wrapped spare ribs sitting out for a little over [an] hour that [were] still partially frozen. [I] then seasoned and refrigerated [the ribs] for dinner tonight.
Donnelly: Yes. When defrosting any potentially hazardous food, particularly meats or poultry, it is important to make sure juices are contained by using sealed bags or containers. Juices can contain harmful pathogens which can contaminate surfaces and people coming into contact with these juices. Again, the warmer potentially hazardous foods are stored, the more potential growth for dangerous bacterial pathogens to levels which can cause disease.
Rosenbaum: Yes. This is especially important with meat, poultry & seafood. When defrosting meat, poultry or seafood in the refrigerator, however, it is important to make sure that it is on a platter or tray and cannot drip raw juices as it defrosts onto or into foods stored below.
Nestle: Not exactly. I don’t have much counter space so I’m most likely to leave it out in a bowl.
Donnelly: I rarely defrost. When I do, I leave the food out on the counter for less than 4 hours.
Powell: I defrost on the counter. I just don’t leave it there very long.

3. Always use separate cutting boards for raw meat/poultry/fish and produce/cooked foods.

Tsai: Definitely—especially because of food allergies, too, on cross contamination.
Marler: Yes.
Kender: No. I always wash, rinse, and sanitize my cutting board when switching proteins or going to a no cook product.
Vergili: No, I will thoroughly clean the same cutting board and use the same board for both raw and cooked products.
Donnelly: Yes, and I make sure to regularly clean and sanitize these boards after use.
Rosenbaum: I do, but this isn’t always practical. It’s more important to clean and sanitize cutting boards thoroughly between uses, even if you only use it for one type of item. Also, inspect your cutting boards from time to time. When they develop deep knife grooves it may be harder for cleaning solutions to reach and kill any bacteria present and then it’s time to replace the board.
Nestle: No. I wash the one I have in between [uses].
Donnelly: Yes. Or I clean and sanitize the same board.
Powell: No, but I clean cutting boards thoroughly.

4. Always cook meat to proper temperatures, using a calibrated instant-read thermometer to make sure.

Tsai: No, I love my burgers rare and my lamb and steak medium rare. I will be struck by lightning or chomped by a great white before undercooked meats get me!
Marler: Yes.
Kender: No. In my house we like our steaks medium rare and our burgers pink in the middle. No one in the high-risk category lives in my home.
Vergili: I have a preference for many grilled foods to be undercooked such as tuna and pasture-raised porterhouse pork chops.
Donnelly: Most of the time. When grilling, I purchase low-risk products (intact muscle meats as opposed to ground beef) and insure that the outsides of these products (where contamination resides) are well cooked. For poultry and roasts, I always use a meat thermometer.
Rosenbaum: Yes, I always use a thermometer. In regards to beef, it is impossible to tell when it is safe to eat without using a thermometer. The color of the cooked meat is a very inaccurate indicator for safety. Different types of beef require different cooking temperatures and the type of thermometer used may also vary. Very thin beef patties, for instance, are best checked with a thermocouple (a type of temperature sensor) while roasts and steaks can use a larger-gauge thermometer.
Nestle: I cook it hot enough but don’t use a thermometer.
Donnelly: No. I use visual cues based on experience.
Powell: Yes. Color is a lousy indicator. I feel naked without a thermometer.

5. Avoid unpasteurized (“raw”) milk and cheeses made from unpasteurized milk that are aged less than 60 days.

Tsai: No, I love the flavor of unpasteurized. See above for lightning and shark.
Marler: Yes!
Kender: Yes, absolutely. I also avoid unpasteurized cider and fruit juices as well.
Vergili: As a rule yes, but I have gone out of my way to buy “certified” raw milk on rare occasions and tasted cheese from a known cheese maker as well. Frankly, there are some questions surrounding cheese made from raw milk and listeriosis despite 60 days of aging.
Donnelly: I do not consume raw milk as I know this is a high-risk product, and most producers are exempt from requirements specified in the Pasteurized Milk Ordinance which greatly enhance milk safety. For raw milk cheeses aged for less than 60 days, if they are AOC or PDO cheeses which I am purchasing and consuming in Europe, I have great confidence in the regulations and production procedures/processes which include stringent microbiological criteria, thus I know these cheeses pose a low food-safety risk. Cheeses made by unlicensed manufacturers and distributed illegally pose a great public health risk and I would not consume such products.
Rosenbaum: Yes. I believe the risk inherent in any raw dairy product far outweighs any potential benefit. This is especially important for pregnant women to avoid as they are at risk for contracting Listeriosis from raw dairy products, which carries a high rate of premature labor and spontaneous abortion.
Nestle: Not always. If I know the supplier, I’ll take the small risk.
Donnelly: Raw milk cheese is safe; raw milk is not.
Powell: Yup. Not worth the risk, especially for pregnant women, and my wife had a baby six months ago.

6. Never eat “runny” eggs or foods, such as cookie dough, that contain raw eggs.

Tsai: No, again, shark and lightning. But at BG, we do use pasteurized eggs and egg whites for desserts (like sabayon and in the hollandaise we make once a year for the Greater Boston Food Bank's Super Hunger Brunch).
Marler: Correct.
Kender: I never eat runny eggs or anything that contains raw eggs. I even prepare my own Caesar salad dressing using pasteurized egg yolks.
Vergili: No, I will eat classic scrambled eggs which are a bit runny, as well as a poached egg cooked less than the 145ºF [that] the codes call for.
Donnelly: Yes. I avoid consumption of raw eggs. There are excellent pasteurized egg products available to consumers which substantially reduce risks posed by pathogens such as Salmonella, Campylobacter and Listeria.
Rosenbaum: This is difficult to answer with the word “never” in it. My answer would depend on whether or not pasteurized eggs were used. When dining out, I always ask whether raw eggs were used in dishes such as sauces, mousses, tiramisù and dressings. If so, then I would avoid these foods unless I knew the facility was using pasteurized eggs. At home, pasteurized-in-shell eggs have become available in my area and I use these whenever I want to enjoy foods that would be risky if using regular eggs and not cooking thoroughly. Interested consumers can request that their grocers carry in-shell pasteurized eggs.
Nestle: Don’t be silly. I’m human.
Donnelly: Eggs should be cooked.
Powell: Nope.

7. Always wash your hands in warm soapy water for at least 20 seconds before handling food and after touching raw meat, poultry or eggs.

Tsai: Yes, definitely!
Marler: Yes.
Kender: I must admit that at my home I may not get through “Happy Birthday” twice before working with some food items, but absolutely always after working with raw meats and poultry!
Vergili: Yes, this is one of the easiest ways to prevent the spread of both pathogenic bacteria and viruses without compromising the culinary preference for a food.
Donnelly: Yes, and I prefer to use antibacterial soaps after handling these products.
Rosenbaum: Yes, or use hand sanitizer. It’s important to thoroughly clean the faucet handle if you’ve touched it after handling raw foods, too. Also, take along hand sanitizers when going to picnics and barbecues away from home where soap and warm running water would be hard to find.
Nestle: Wash hands, yes, but I don’t count seconds.
Donnelly: Yes.
Powell: Nope. 20 seconds is too long and water temperature doesn’t matter; but I do wash my hands routinely.

8. Always heat leftover foods to 165ºF.

Tsai: Yes.
Marler: Yes.
Kender: Never have leftovers at my home.
Vergili: No, as stated, this is one of the most misunderstood regulations. The recommendation basically pertains to leftover items in large volumes like chili or thick soups that need to be reheated slowly to ensure quality. A piece of beef previously cooked, such as a serving of prime rib, need not be reheated to 165ºF (it becomes more like pot roast).
Donnelly: Yes.
Rosenbaum: I do not generally use a thermometer for leftovers. I do re-cook soups and liquids until they boil, and heat other leftovers until they are steaming. It’s important to stop midway and stir food reheated in the microwave due to cold spots and uneven heating.
Nestle: I get them steaming hot, but don’t measure.
Donnelly: No. I use common sense.
Powell: Nope. 140ºF is sufficient if it has already been cooked.


9. Never eat meat, poultry, eggs or sliced fresh fruits and vegetables that have been left out for more than 2 hours (1 hour in temperatures hotter than 90°F).

Tsai: Fruits and veggies, fine. Meat and seafood, no! At BG, we are always very cognizant of the temperature danger zone; everything is refrigerated and/or cooled down properly.
Marler: Yes.
Kender: Never….especially during summer here in New England. I insist that all our outdoor activities, such as cookouts, have ice, and lots of it, that is used to keep the salads and other food items cold.
Vergili: No, if [it’s] at a group gathering, I would consider eating a raw vegetable or fruit that has been served unrefrigerated (assuming it hasn’t become oxidized, [which I find] unappealing).
Donnelly: Yes, Adherence to proper storage temperatures and the 2-hour rule are proven food-safety measures.
Rosenbaum: Yes. The rule in our house is, “If in doubt, throw it out!” I try to have several trays of the same food prepared when I entertain so they can be rotated and refrigerated in between.
Nestle: You don’t say whether these are cooked or uncooked or what the ambient temperature might be. Microbial growth rates depend on those factors.
Donnelly: No. I use common sense. 4 hours is the limit
Powell: did not offer a response (shurley sum mistake – dp)


10. Whenever there’s a food recall, check products stored at home to make sure they are safe.

Tsai: Yes.
Marler: Yes.
Kender: Yes. I receive recall notices at work and take that information home with me and always double check what I’ve purchased
Vergili: Yes, I would do that.
Donnelly: Yes. In fact, I just returned some cookie dough to a retail outlet for a refund.
Rosenbaum: Yes, and since recall information on food products is very difficult for consumers to obtain, my organization constantly looks for recalls and sends them in daily e-alerts to email inboxes. Anyone can sign up to receive them by sending a request to mail@safetables.org or go to our website daily at www.safetables.org to view them. Some stores post food recalls, while others send text messages or mailed notices. It is important for consumers to throw away or return for refund any product subject to a recall, as these products have either already made people sick or have a high likelihood of being contaminated. If you believe someone in your family has already eaten the product and/or gotten ill, you should keep the product and safely wrap and store it for the health authorities to test.
Nestle: I’ve never had a product involved in a recall except the can of recalled pet food given to me as a research gift for my book, Pet Food Politics.
Donnelly: I purchase locally grown, fresh foods.
Powell: Sure.

During an episode of the TV show The Office Michael Scott burns his foot on a George Foreman grill while cooking bacon (see right). I did the exact same thing this past weekend, and now my bubble-wrapped foot and I have been tossing and turning at night.

Last night while wallowing in self-pity and pain I heard two of my flatmates get up to use the bathroom (my bedroom is right next to the facilities). I heard the bathroom door shut, toilet flush, and…nothing. No sound of the tap running while the night-pee-ers washed their hands.

Do you wash your hands during a mid-night tinkle?
 

The ongoing saga of doggie dining in North Carolina gets a bit muddier. Today, a Wake County attorney weighed in on health authorities enforcing a "no live animals in food preparation areas" rule by not allowing dogs on patios.

Attorney Scott Warren says he thinks the rule is meant to keep animals out of kitchen areas where food is prepared or pantry areas where food is stored. He says that means it's up to restaurants to decide whether to allow animals on patios, unless federal law protects that right.

The Toronto Star reports this morning that a Maple Leaf Foods executive has apologized after joking about last year’s listeria outbreak in Canada that killed 22 people.

There are any number of elements that make this story particularly gross and uniquely Canadian.

It all began one-year ago yesterday – or at least that’s what Maple Leaf CEO and spokesthingy Michael McCain would have Canadians believe. McCain and Maple Leaf ran full-page advertisements in newspapers across Canada yesterday, saying oops, sorry about that listeria thing that killed 22 people last fall.

McCain wrote on the company blog,

“It was a year ago on August 23, 2008 that some of our products were linked to the death of 22 Canadians and made many others very ill.”

That’s fantasy. Maple Leaf products were epidemiologically linked to illness and death in Canadians in July. Both the company and the Canadian Food Inspection Agency have steadfastly refused to give a full accounting of who knew what when. But that’s not me talking – that’s from the chief medical officer of Ontario.

And then, I guess while Maple Leaf types were being credited for another PR sensitivity win, a video of a Maple Leaf vp surfaces showing him joking about the listeria illnesses and deaths. 

I blogged it yesterday, and within an hour, former B.C. Deputy Minister of Agriculture and current Maple Leaf vp Rory McAlpine (left, exactly as shown) wrote on barfblog.com:

“I want to sincerely apologize on your blog for the joke with which I began my comments at the Conference earlier in August.  These were my personal remarks, and I appreciate in hindsight they were not appropriate given the Listeriosis outbreak and the death and illness it caused.  I didn’t in any way mean to make light of this tragedy and I feel terrible that my early remarks conveyed a callousness that I don't feel. You have every right to call me on it and I am deeply sorry.   

“I hope my full remarks that day, the questions from the audience and my participation in the panel discussion reflect better on how acutely accountable I and everyone at Maple Leaf feels for what happened and all the actions we are taking to achieve our commitment to food safety leadership.”

That’s some well-sized kahunas. I’ve also said dumb things and had to apologize. But McCain said yesterday, “holding ourselves to a higher standard means we will act more quickly and more assertively when there is a potential food safety concern - even a small one.”

So, once again, before anyone at Maple Leaf gives lectures on how to handle a crisis – which Rory has done, it’s all online – make your listeria data public and put warning labels on your product so pregnant woman, the elderly and others don’t barf from your food.

As I told the Toronto Star,

"It's nice that he apologized, but it would be better if he'd put warnings labels on products for old people and pregnant women and make (listeria test result) data public."

It’s also sorta gross that no one from the best and brightest conference at Couchiching where Rory laid down his comedian wares said anything about this until yesterday. They all seemed to have a ball (right). How Canadian.

Rory may not remember me but when he was deputy minister of agriculture, I was invited in Dec. 2003 to give a talk at a meeting of all the deputy ministers of agriculture, and I talked about how food safety reality should match rhetoric. Maybe Rory stepped out.

And I note Rory is on the International Advisory Council for the Ontario Agricultural College – or at least he was. When I was at the University of Guelph, the Dean du jour of OAC would annually speak to us lowly faculty about the need to be visionary and how we could use the advice of visionary dudes to be better professors.

So the Dean would spend college money on some sort of international advisory committee which was usually staffed with colleagues and cronies near and dear to the dean.

It’s true: the best and brightest do rise to the top. Kudos to Rory.

In a six-hour meeting yesterday, Sunday, August 23, at the Crowne Plaza Hotel in Trevose, Bucks County, Pennsylvania, the H1N1 flu vaccine was discussed. The main question was how to approach the public: “full throttle” and “go slow” options were debated. The meeting included watching videos about pandemics, vaccines, and the brief history of H1N1.

The vaccine would be taken on a voluntary basis regardless of the panel’s decision, but how educating the public, the benefits or risks of the vaccine, and possible mandating of the vaccine seems to be what most of the panel members are concerned with.

Prevention of H1N1 by handwashing did not seem to be a topic of conversation.

This meeting is one of ten that are occurring across the US. To read the full article, click here.

The best Canadian comedians move to the U.S. The worst apparently stay and become Minister of Agriculture or a vp at some $5.5 billion a year corporation that discovers food safety after killing 22 people.

First it was Canadian Agriculture Minister Gerry-isn’t-my-moustache-awesome Ritz joking that he was dying by a thousand cold cuts.

Now, a Maple Leaf Foods vp is shown on YouTube, yucking it up for Canadian policy wonks in Ontario cottage country on August 8, 2009.

Every year, the witty and urbane of Canada put on their best Berkenstocks and retreat to the Couchiching conference. A barfblog.com fan e-mailed me at the time, and said via a redirected twitter post, Rory McAlpine of Maple Leaf Foods “suggests an approach to food safety that takes in the accountability of the consumer.”

At the time I thought, what an asshole. Are consumers supposed to be deep-frying their deli meats? But I had no further information, no verification, so didn’t bother blogging the story.

The video has surfaced.

I first heard this joke about the Toronto Maple Leafs, listeria and the Leafs inability to win hockey’s coveted Stanley Cup, a futility streak going back to 1967, last year.

I thought it was tasteless and said so at the time.

Guess Rory stayed in Canada, where he still may be considered funny.

So here’s Rory McAlpine, vice-president, Government and Industry Relations, Maple Leaf Foods, and former British Columbia deputy minister of Agriculture, with his rendition of, hey, my own kid got listeria from my products, what’s the big deal?
 

As thousands of American college students prepare for their first classes this morning, Doug makes pizza and tries to answer the question: can I eat that pizza I left out last night?

Evan had fun editing and that’s not my baby sneezing (and falling out of the chair).
 

While ironic that a magazine called Woman’s Day would feature the top-10 surprising foods on a stick – there’s probably an app for that – here they are:

Deep-Fried Spam (right)

Deep-Fried Bacon Cheddar Mashed Potatoes

Octopus Tempura

Deep-Fried Tootsie Roll

Deep-Fried Mac-n-Cheese

Pizza

Deep-Fried Bacon and Fries

Deep-Fried Chocolate Cake (left)

Livermush

Deep-Fried Cheese
 

The owners of the Green Man Public House in Stanford, UK, were fined more than £6,000 after failing to comply with food safety laws.

One of the pub owners said,

"We were not aware that we weren't complying with the law, but feel the council could have helped us more.

"When the bloke who did the inspection came into the kitchen that morning, we had two chefs in there which left it messy and he took it to the extreme in my opinion.

"Our business has always been based on common sense. Everything that comes in here is fresh and we are always stringent with food.

"The kitchen is cleaned all the time, it's an ongoing thing. After a busy weekend, the kitchen doesn't usually get bleached until the middle of the week.”

I wouldn’t want to eat there on Monday.
 

Food safety seems to be very hot topic lately especially with the whole Listeria thing but how effective are food safety communicators in getting the word out to the public? I was struck the other day, when at the grocery store, I had asked a pregnant lady whether or not she was concerned eating the lovely bag of bean sprouts she was holding in her hands. She laughed and replied yeah maybe the bag but not the sprouts. She continued on by saying that sprouts are a healthy choice and are great when mixed into salads, sandwiches, and other like foods. Had I asked this woman the same question regarding raw chicken, nine times out of ten, Salmonella would have been shouted out to the roof top, in an annoying Celine Dion sort of way. It seems to be a lot different when it comes to bean sprouts. So, food safety geek on alert, I decided to survey a number of people at the grocery store, some of my pregnant friends, and family members asking if they were concerned with eating this product. The answer was repeatedly no. A list of outbreaks concerning bean sprouts and food safety information on this topic can be found at http://www.foodsafety.ksu.edu/en/article-details.php?a=2&c=6&sc=36&id=865.

ConAgra CEO thingy Gary Rodkin is on a quest

A quest to find what he calls "the big, singular insight that will drive behavior change." If he can do that, he can boost the bottom line (which was $978 million on revenue of $12.7 billion in the fiscal year ended May 31). Rodkin is using theories about buying habits--backed by $399 million a year in advertising, marketing and in-store promotions--to convince grocery stores to provide ample shelves for its 45 consumer brands, which include Chef Boyardee, Healthy Choice, Hebrew National, Wesson and Swiss Miss.

I have a suggestion. Don’t make people barf, with your Banquet pot pies and your peanut butter. Seriously, $399 million in advertising, and you can’t promise people they won’t barf?

And the best guest speaker you can get is me naked in New Zealand (cost to ConAgra bottom line – nothing).

Is grinding an effective form of birth control? Are condoms recommended during oral sex? Should horny college students kiss while wearing surgical masks to reduce incidence of swine flu?

In what should provide a stimulus to the sexy doctor/nurse outfit industry, the U.S. Centers for Disease Control yesterday issued advice suggesting that if college students are ill, they should refrain from kissing but, if they must, wear a surgical mask while doing the deed.

Substitute the word condom for mask in the following excerpts from the story; makes it fun.

The recommendation reads, "If close contact with others cannot be avoided, the ill student should be asked to wear a surgical mask during the period of contact. Examples of close contact include kissing, sharing eating or drinking utensils, or having any other contact between persons likely to result in exposure to respiratory droplets."

CDC spokesperson Tom Skinner acknowledged that the language of the recommendation was confusing and that the agency would "look at rewording" the guidance.

"We're not telling them to wear a mask when they kiss," Skinner said. "What we're trying to do is give examples of 'close contact.'"

We’ll stick with our advice, below.

Casey Jacob did a nice job on this brief paper, responding to the suggestions of reviewers and, dare I say, developing as a writer.

Foodborne Pathogens and Disease published the abstract this evening, but not the full paper, by Jacob and Powell.

So here’s the abstract as a teaser.

Foodservice professionals, politicians, and the media are often cited making claims as to which locations most often expose consumers to foodborne pathogens. Many times, it is implied that most foodborne illnesses originate from food consumed where dishes are prepared to order, such as restaurants or in private homes. The manner in which the question is posed and answered frequently reveals a speculative bias that either favors homemade or foodservice meals as the most common source of foodborne pathogens. Many answers have little or no scientific grounding, while others use data compiled by passive surveillance systems. Current surveillance systems focus on the place where food is consumed rather than the point where food is contaminated. Rather than focusing on the location of consumption—and blaming consumers and others—analysis of the steps leading to foodborne illness should center on the causes of contamination in a complex farm-to-fork food safety system.
 

In another triumph for food porn, uniting the world of figure skating with home cooking, 1998 Olympic gold medalist and South Park enthusiast, Brian Boitano has his own cooking show.

Boitano, now 45, has turned into a hard-core foodie.  … You'd certainly be hard-pressed to find another TV chef with his own "South Park" song. "What Would Brian Boitano Do?," a highlight of the 1999 animated movie, not only serves as the opening theme for Boitano's new show but provided the obvious inspiration for its title. In each episode, Boitano hosts a get-together at his home, creating a custom menu for his guests, who range from his single-and-ready-to-mingle friend and 20 bachelorettes to a bacon-loving all-girl roller derby. His take on mostly rustic home cooking is inventive, yet straightforward enough not to intimidate the casual cook. But the show's biggest revelation is Boitano himself. Known for his laser-like focus on the ice, he reveals an irreverent side in "What Would Brian Boitano Make?"

Terence and Philip are Canadian, eh.
 

"At night all you could hear was vomiting from every corner. I've never experienced anything like it. People were simply zipping up their tents and leaving — they just wanted to get out of there.”

That’s the dream lede for a barfblog.com post, although probably not pleasant for some 150 campers stricken at a North Devon campsite.

"Almost every tent on the site was affected. There were so many sick children — it was an awful sight to witness.”

North Devon Council said the owners took the decision to close the campsite.

The site has a private water supply which has been closed off due to possible contamination.
 

It's a pretty difficult to answer that question -- and it's a trap.

Yesterday I attended the N.C. Ag Commissioner's Food Safety Forum, where a mix of regulators, industry and academia got together to food safety nerd it up (in a good way). Peanut butter and Salmonella were popular topics as was food safety legislation like HR2749.

One of the speakers mentioned that we "enjoy the safest food supply in the world" in North Carolina, and I thought I didn't realize it was a competition and how would that even be measured? We've written about this statement a lot before, but something I've never thought about is that it provides a false sense of security and doesn't help move towards a food safety culture. I don't get the sense that the "safest food supply" comment leads to increased consumer confidence (but who knows, maybe it does). Talking frankly about food safety risks and how they are addressed seems more important to me. While there are lots (like in the hundreds of millions) of meals eaten in the U.S. every day that don't cause illnesses, there are a few that do.  

Another speaker, N.C. Dept of Public Health's  David Bergmire-Sweat said something that had much more substance than the "safest food" comment: When an outbreak happens, it's an opportunity to figure out what part of the farm-to-fork continuum failed. Whether it was inadequate prevention measures, or effective prevention measures being implemented inadequately, it's a chance for food safety risk managers to learn what to do next time to avoid the problems.

Embarrassing as it is to admit, I used to watch the somewhat popular Canadian Red Green show (pictured right) – it really reminds me of my Uncle Bob. According to The Observer online, Sarnia may soon be adopting a green-yellow-red colour coded restaurant disclosure system similar to Toronto (pictured below).

Mayor Mike Bradley is determined that residents and local visitors will know exactly how Sarnia- Lambton restaurants fare in health and safety inspections by taking a quick glance in the front window.

A green card in a restaurant would signal that Ontario food safety laws are being followed. A yellow sign would indicate it's safe to eat there but non-critical violations need to be corrected. If it's red, an immediate hazard is present and the restaurant is closed.

Currently, the health unit posts on its website the names of restaurants convicted of food safety violations. The convictions website only deals with the most serious violations.

But mayor Bradley is not happy with just that, saying,

"We have a lot of tourists here and they aren't going to check a website. This is a public health issue. Why are we so reluctant to implement a simple system?"

Explaining that he has the support of the public, Bradley said,

“I will tell you this: I've never had opposition from restaurateurs. They understand this is to their benefit."

The proposed colour-coded disclosure system is similar to those operating in Toronto and London, ON already -- copycat scores-on-doors programs are common. When the city of Auckland, New Zealand implemented a letter grading scheme similar systems popped up throughout the rest of the country. L.A.’s popular grading scheme has trickled throughout the U.S. with many jurisdictions adopting similar systems; and in Connecticut the various creepy symbols are spanning districts.
 

The most awesome thing I ever did as a parent – according to Amy – is when we were flying back from Florida last year with daughter Courtlynn (right, with Sorenne).

As the plane touched down in Kansas City, Courtlynn had that 13-year-old look of nausea that I recognized far too well.

I knew she was going to spew.

I deftly retrieved the barf bag from the seat pocket in front of me, Courtlynn filled it, and I nonchalantly deboarded the plane, barf bag in one hand, daughter’s hand in the other, and deposited it in the first available garbage receptacle.

Amy was awestruck.

Marlene, otherwise known as Momma, is apparently awestruck by people who edit blogs containing the word barf. She sent me an e-mail a couple of weeks ago flogging her oversized, fully disposable barf bags that come complete with sanitizing wipes for quick clean-up. And in three logos -- one for pregnancy, one for travel, and one with a college-style logo -- puke university.

Thanks for the swag, Momma. The three types of barf bags were at the homestead when we returned on Sunday. Who doesn’t need an appropriately adorned barf bag?

The corporate geniuses at Virgin Blue airlines must be delighted that the listeria-laden chicken served on Virgin Blue flights that sickened seven and caused two premature births has been linked to Wollongong-based company GMI Food Wholesalers.

But Virgin Blue served the food – they are responsible.

"It appears the likely source of the contamination was an ingredient supplied to the manufacturers of the wraps and not Virgin Blue or other companies who received the affected products. Virgin Blue has removed the product from service at the end of June."

Brisbane-based solicitor Mark O'Connor stated what any company should know: Virgin Blue served the food, Virgin Blue is responsible.

"The airline in turn would have to make a claim against the supplier of the food but for passengers, it’s the airline that is liable.”

Virgin Blue should check on its suppliers rather than trying to cover their ass with (bad) PR.
 

A guy goes into a restaurant in Aurora, Ill., and says, “Waiter, there’s a fly in my salad.”

The guy has a burger instead and the restaurant, Walter Payton’ Roundhouse, picks up the bill.

The guy then goes home and sends an e-mail to some 300 people, stating,

“Health Warning:  The Kane County Health Department will be conducting an on-site inspection of Walter Payton’s Roundhouse after several complaints about flies within meals. Please stay away until the Kane County Health Department issues their official findings.”

The Health Department apparently investigated the incident and found a small number of fruit flies around the bar.

Last week, America’s Brewing Co., which owns the restaurant, sued the guy for defamation, seeking more than $100,000.

BBC News reports that two girls who attended a dance camp in Pembrokeshire have contracted E.coli, it has been confirmed.

An 11-year-old from the West Midlands is being treated in hospital and a seven-year-old from Denbighshire is recovering at home.

Both had attended Dance Camp Wales in Cresselly, which runs between 29 July and 9 August.

Social networking website Facebook is being used to try to contact about 650 people who attended a dance camp after two girls contracted E.coli.

Environmental health officials are also sending letters, e-mails and phoning, where they have contact details.

A spokeswoman said they had turned to Facebook because the event has its own group on the website.

People who experience symptoms are asked to contact Pembrokeshire council's public protection department on 01437 764551 (between 1000 BST and 1800 BST on weekends and between 0800 BST and 1800 BST on weekdays) or email foodsafety@pembrokeshire.gov.uk.
 

Rhys Darby, or Murray off of Flight of the Conchords is hilarious. Last night I watched one of his stand-up routines and nearly peed my pants I was laughing so hard. I then proceeded to watch Dane Cook – Isolated Incident. It was not as funny; however, the venue for the routine, the Laugh Factory in Los Angeles, CA appeared to have received an A-grade during its inspection (see picture, right).

In L.A. food establishments are awarded an A, B, or C grade based on their most recent inspection score, and are required to display this grade in a visible location (like a window or door). The grades are also available online, here.

I wouldn’t award Dane an A for laughter, but my buddy Rhys on the other hand, he’s all A’s. I hope to get see him in November when he pops by Wellington.
 

Pointing out the hypocrisy of Whole Foods is like going quail hunting with Dick Cheney: too easy, too stupid, and someone’s going to get shot in the face (or near the heart).

Whole Foods, defenders of all things natural and sustainable, is featuring beer imported from Germany -- or Czech Republic, depending on who's brewing it -- this month.

Beer is one of those things that can be fairly easily produced in a local venue: hops, malt, water, yeast.

Whole Foods CEO John Mackay was right last week when he said Whole Foods sold a bunch of junk.
 

Whether it’s a personal poop tracking system or toilet locations you’re after it seems there’s an iPhone app for that. The latest in cool apps is a restaurant inspection disclosure application developed for New South Wales in Australia, reports the Sydney Morning Herald Online.

A new iPhone app will tell you if a nearby restaurant has been fined for breach of food safety standards. The application, FoodWatch NSW, brings the Food Authority's name-and-shame list to your fingertips by using the iPhone's GPS to show you a list of restaurants near your location that have been added to the list.

The tool gives the user the ability to view the list any time, wherever the user is.
Some of the main features include a map where one can view, pan and zoom around to all the nearby penalised restaurants. And just like the Food Authorities' name and shame list, it won't show penalties that are older than 12 months…

Chief executive officer of the company that generated the app, Keith Ahern, said

"While I think a lot of restaurants aren't happy about it [the list], you can see the information and make your own decision.”

The free app uses information from the NSW Food Authority website, located here.

Let's throw another shrimp on the barbie!

Coldmud.com highlighted what it called the best commercial ever?: this gem for Nissin cup noodle European-style cheese curry.

Flip flops are gross microbiological factories loaded with E. coli, Staph aureus and fecal matter that will soon be returning to university campuses around the U.S.

Duh.

At least CBS medical correspondent Dr. Jennifer Ashton had the sense to say,

"Have there been people who have gotten some pretty bad skin infections because they've been wearing flip flops or walked barefoot? Sure.”

Ashton said in her opinion, food poisoning, which can contain bacteria, is a more significant health risk than germy flip flops.

Like the latest restaurant inspections from Dade County, home of Miami, the other coast in Florida.

• The Oasis Restaurant (19 Harbor Drive, Key Biscayne) - Critical. Stop Sale issued on potentially hazardous food due to temperature abuse.

• Georges (3145 Commodore Plaza, Miami) - Critical. Stop Sale issued on potentially hazardous food due to temperature abuse.

• Good Way Cafeteria (10932 NW 7 Ave) - Critical. Observed rodent activity as evidenced by rodent droppings found. 30 plus fresh droppings under table in kitchen.

• Casa Panza (1620 SW 8 St, Miami) - Critical. Observed rodent activity as evidenced by rodent droppings found. oberved about 30 + shiny and moist dropping on floor behind coffee worktable.and about 25+ on floor behind stove in kitchen , and about 10+ in floor in bar area back dining room. fresh and moist.

• San Miguel Market Cafeteria (2600 NW 21st Ave) - Critical. Violation: 35A-05-1 Observed roach activity as evidenced by 32 plus live roaches found in kitchen by the cookline. 3 live roaches behind reachin freezer next to steam table, 2 live roaches inside ice bin, 2 live roaches inside to go cup box by bathroom.
 

When was the last time you opened your fridge and saw this- the mold monster?  Hopefully never, but if you have, you’ve probably experienced some sort of sickness related to eating the food from the fridge.  Mold grows from decomposing organic material, and in addition to a foul order and slime, mold is a great indicator of food going bad.  But food can be decidedly “bad” before the mold fully appears.

Unfortunately the busy life of student has led me to find the mold monster lurking in my fridge on more than one occasion.  CNNHealth gives some great advice to college students this week: “Don’t eat mold.”  Not only is it unappetizing, but molds can cause allergic reactions and respiratory problems as well as produce mycotoxins, poisonous substances that can make you sick.

I’ve definitely never gone as far to intentionally consume mold.  I believe in labeling my leftovers with the date and smelling foods before eating them.  It’s not a foolproof way to avoid food-borne illness from moldy foods, but it’s better than eating leftovers blindly.

CNNHealth goes on to offer additional tips to enjoy a meal from the fridge: The U.S. Department of Agriculture Food Safety and Inspection Service recommends discarding moldy bread and baked goods, because of their porous texture.
Creamy dairy products like yogurt can easily spread mold and should be discarded. Soft cheeses with high moisture content -- including those that are shredded, sliced, or crumbled -- can be contaminated with both mold and bacteria. So throw those away, experts advise.
Hard cheeses can be saved, as long as the mold is cut 1 inch around the spot. Because of the cheese's hardness, the mold generally cannot penetrate deep into the product.

Mom taught me well, to throw away any bread with the slightest bit of mold, and to keep moldy hard cheese but to cut away the mold. (Within reason of course, I’m talking about cutting off a dime-sized piece of mold, not eating a furry piece of cheese.)  I also try to disinfect my fridge at least every six months.

What if the fridge doesn’t belong to you?  Office or community fridges can be hot spots for spoiled food and moldy surfaces.  The Pittsburg Post-Gazette cites a survey by the American Dietetic Association and ConAgra Foods which “found that 44 percent of office refrigerators are cleaned once a month and 22 percent are cleaned only once or twice a year.”

Clean out your fridge at home with a household kitchen cleaner – preferably something with bleach.  Institute a bi-weekly cleanup day for the office fridge.  These are two terrific ways to lower your risk of contracting a food-borne illness from fridge food.  You can also reference the USDA’s guide on moldy food when deciding what to trash or save.

Also, don’t forget to wash your hands after touching all that mold.

This isn’t a Chevy Chase-John Candy (right) kind of vacation.

The widow of an elderly British tourist who died after falling ill with salmonella poisoning at a luxury Italian hotel has called for better safety standards at holiday resorts.

The Birmingham Post reports that Jean Appleyard and her husband, Geoffrey, aged 71, were staying at the four-star Grand Hotel in the Gardone resort on the shores of Lake Garda last year when both began to suffer from fever and stomach pains.

An inquest at South Worcestershire Coroners’ Court yesterday recorded a verdict of misadventure after hearing evidence that the salmonella poisoning Mr Appleyard contracted contributed to his death.

Coroner Geraint Williams said:

“Although the hotel seemed very picturesque, there was a very dark side in the kitchen and cellars where there was a virulent contamination of salmonella in the foodstuffs. This was served to the guests and, as a consequence, a large number became ill. Mr Appleyard died because he was not able to withstand this infection.”

The Italian authorities confirmed that salmonella was detected at the hotel.

Mrs Appleyard said, 

“We went to the Grand Hotel for a luxury holiday. It is simply appalling that we fell ill and Geoffrey contracted something as serious as salmonella at a hotel like that. Tour operators have to ensure they are doing everything they possibly can to make sure holidaymakers are protected from outbreaks like this.”

Meanwhile, The Independent reports that 50-year-old Julian Hurley from South Yorkshire, U.K., said he was delighted today after being awarded nearly £300,000 compensation from tour operator First Choice following his diagnosis of shigella after eating "poor-standard" food at an all-inclusive hotel in Venezuela in August 2004.

Mr Hurley said.

"When we went to the hotel restaurant I tried a variety of different dishes, which included cooked meats. The food was of an extremely poor standard, a lot of the dishes were undercooked and some of them were almost cold. The impact that this hellish holiday has had on our lives has been devastating. I now struggle to walk long distances and find myself getting tired easily. I am still suffering from symptoms to this day and will do for the rest of my life, which has been very difficult to come to terms with.”

 

The Age in Australia posted some crack-up, some gross, reader responses to last week’s "Tables of horror” story, found below. My favourite is Spoon discrimination.

Cockroaches ‘no surprise’
I had a terrible experience at a Fitzroy restaurant. The meal itself was very enjoyable, until we noticed baby cockroaches crawling all over the table, our plate and our food… When I finally did bring it to the attention [of the wait staff] , the waiter initially responded well by apologising and not charging us for the food.
Then he did something that simply made our blood boil: he starting defending it, first by saying that customers should not, under any circumstances, get upset at restaurants! He said we did not understand the food business and his restaurant career was littered with such stories. The building was old, he explained, and therefore cockroaches should be no surprise… The waiter’s arrogance was even more upsetting than the cockroaches.
-Steven Yatomi-Clarke, West Preston

Maggots removed
Four years ago my wife and I went to a well-known vegetarian restaurant and in one of the dishes the dates contained maggots. We discreetly told the waiter, so as not to cause a scene. The dish was removed, but what came back didn’t appear to be a new dish, just the old one with the dates removed. We were given a free mint tea or a free dessert, but no particularly sincere apology from the wait staff for this rather obvious breach of health standards. We have never been back.
-David Sheehan, Oak Park

Too tough for what?
We ordered a lamb curry at a well-known Indian restaurant and the lamb was too tough to eat (this occasionally happens even in good Indian restaurants). On complaining to the waiter, the chef came out to our table, stuck his hand into the bowl, grabbed a piece of lamb, tore it in two with his bare hands and said: "There, it’s not too tough!" We weren’t convinced.
-Michael Rowell, Ararat

Great, but for the worm
WE WENT to a place in Brighton that was recommended. We ordered fresh oysters. We had a few. A friend held one of the oysters, when a pinkish red worm crawled out of the flesh of the oyster, climbed up the shell. She screamed…
-Caroline Arman, East St Kilda

Spoon discrimination
NOT really a tale of horror, but bizarre standards . . . I was recently having a regular lunch at a city restaurant, and on ordering dessert was surprised when the waitress placed a soup spoon in front of me. When I queried it, her reply was, "We don’t discriminate between spoons here, they are all the same to us." There was then a pause, and she rather grudgingly asked me if I wanted her to change it to a dessert spoon — to which I said yes. I was made to feel it was unreasonable to use a dessert spoon! Have the rules of dining changed?
-Claire Mitchell, Northcote

A blog posting on iamnuerotic.com was brought to my attention yesterday. Most of the postings are pretty interesting, whether you agree, disagree, or think people are crazy. And anyone can submit a neurosis to possibly be posted. Examples of my personal neuroses would include tying paper straw wrappers into knots and folding them into small pieces before I throw them away. Or eating sandwiches in a circular pattern because they taste better that way.

 “fake hand washing” was posted on September 29, 2008, so I know it's not recent, but I thought it was valid to talk about.

This person writes, “I don’t wash my hands every time after going to the bathroom because I don’t want to aggravate my dry skin too much. But I want everyone to think I’ve washed my hands so after I flush I turn on the faucet and let the water run for people to hear. I want it to be believable though, so I mime washing my hands to make sure I let the water run for exactly how long it would take me to really do it.”

If you’re going to take the time to fake handwash, why not actually clean your hands? And if it’s because of dry skin, why not use lotions? And if you think your hands didn’t touch anything, how do you know for sure if microbiological pathogens are too small to see?

The website will also be publishing a book, i am neurotic (and so are you), by HarperStudio on October 13, 2009.
 

Being an Office fan, "That's what she said" has not jumped the shark for me; but being an iPhone owner, "There's an app for that" has.

I'm not all loaded up with apps, and tend to stick with the low risk free ones. Today I splurged and spent $.99 on Poop the World (thanx Gonzo for the suggestion).

I just downloaded it and the opening screen says "Get started! Track your bowel movements in real-time, share with friends, and strive for recognition in a fun and civilized manner!"

Okay. You had me at bowel movements.

This app is a bit like playing Tony Hawk, there are achievement levels like "The Daily Quad" (4 poops in a day) and "Sir Deuce-a-lot" (20 poops in a week).

The poop database is also sortable. So I've got that going for me. If you wish to follow, I'm at Defender of the can.

It appears that you can follow the poops at pooptheworld.com. While it's all fun, maybe there is a google analytics/flu tracking aspect to this. Poop the world might be an early indicator of a national foodborne illness outbreak.

In 2007 owners of a St. Catharines, Ontario restaurant made the poor decision to continue preparing and serving food after water to the establishment had been cut off. The result: at least six people became violently ill, of which three children were hospitalized.

The owners of Yamen restaurant are appealing the court’s verdict regarding two lawsuits totaling 4.3 million in damages, reports The Standard.

Senan Daoud and Mahmoud Asaad are being sued by two families who say they were “violently ill” and continue to suffer after being fed contaminated food.

The Yaman Restaurant co-owners were in court Monday to argue they should be allowed to appeal a March 27 ruling that found them guilty of five counts each of selling food unfit for human consumption.

The cases happened at the Merritt Street restaurant in May 2007, when Asaad and Daoud continued to run the business, despite the fact its water was cut off because of a water-main break. The restaurant was shut down by the Region after several people got sick in May 2007 and reopened in August 2007 with a clean bill of health.

Meanwhile, the families of three girls in St. Catharines and Niagara Falls who were hospitalized following the outbreak have launched lawsuits… Robert and Arlene Willis, with daughter Sara Willis, are suing after eating at the restaurant on May 25, 2007…Jennifer Boehm and 10- and six-year-old daughters Brooklyn and Kassidy Hamelin, ate at the restaurant the following day and are suing, along with the girls’ father, Robert Hamelin.

The court documents say the plaintiffs became “violently ill” within a week of eating at Yaman and were in need of “extensive” medical treatment for their injuries.
Some of those conditions included cramping, abdominal pain, bloody diarrhea, vomiting, fatigue, sleep disturbance, loss of appetite, nausea and headaches.

… [A]ll three children were admitted to local hospitals, while Kassidy was so ill, she was transferred to McMaster Children’s Hospital in Hamilton and was hospitalized for two weeks.
 

I am from California. In California, it’s called a barbeque. I went to college in Alabama and graduate school in Kansas where both places call it a grill. The box labeled it a barbeque grill, so I guess everyone is right.

Regardless of the name, I purchased my very first barbeque this weekend. I put it together correctly and cooked chicken on it. I had never barbequed (or grilled) by myself, but I knew exactly when my chicken was done cooking: my tip sensitive, digital thermometer told me so. My chicken was cooked to a perfect 165°F.

And yes, I also thoroughly washed my hands before cooking and after touching any raw chicken.

When you’re barbequing, stick it in.

My flatmate Dan was away in Auckland (New Zealand) this weekend, and although the house was slightly quieter and cleaner with him gone, we’re glad to have him return. While updating us on his weekend up north Dan told of his search for an A-grade Indian restaurant.

His explanation went something like this,

“I didn’t want someone nasty handling my food – there were a lot of B places, but I wanted an A.”

He wandered the Auckland streets and after something like 5 restaurants found his A-grade premise.

Auckland assigns A (see right), B, D and E grades to restaurants, and awards excellent facilities a Gold A. Obviously Dan was unaware of the Gold A when searching for a place to eat. That’s one of the issues with restaurant grades – lack of consistency. While Auckland uses letter grades, Wellington awards Excellent cards. A consistent grading system may aid consumers like Dan in their quest for a safe place to grab a bite in a new city.

Restaurant grades in Auckland can also be found online, here.

Chapman got his obligatory profile as new faculty in one of the North Carolina State University publications this week; this is the bites/barfblog version.

When Ben Chapman arrived at N.C. State University in January as the new food safety specialist in the Department of 4-H Youth Development and Family and Consumer Sciences, he hit the ground running. …

Since arriving in North Carolina, Chapman has converted from a former Toronto Maple Leafs hockey fan to a Carolina Hurricanes fan.

Carolina has a good hockey team and tickets are easy to get. Toronto sucks and tickets are impossible to get. Carolina has also won the Stanley Cup once in the past 42 years. Toronto has not.

He says that he spends much of his free time discussing the virtues of hockey with his wife and son (that's Jack, below, left, at a Hurricanes game in about 4 years)..

Those who can, do. Others teach. Others talk. Others bore their families.

A player himself since age 4, he has even started playing hockey here in North Carolina with a group in Wake Forest.

If he’s been playing since 4 he really should be better.

Chapman has focused on finding the best ways to communicate food safety risk to the people who need to know. He is interested in how social media like Facebook and rapid communication technologies like Twitter might improve public safety around the issue of food risk.

It also helps to stay current on all the social media for fantasy baseball/football/hockey/cycling tips.

Chapman had a sense that the bathroom posters proclaiming that “employees must wash hands before returning to work” might not produce the desired results.

It was probably the sense of smell, coming from his hands.

Chapman even spent a semester working as a dishwasher in a restaurant to get a better sense of what the work climate was like.

I didn’t pay him enough as a graduate student and he had to moonlight.

Chapman noted that during busy times, employees tended to forget safe food-handling practices. “When it’s busy in a food-service operation, it gets really crazy,” he said.

That’s when the Pink Floyd is cranked.

In his new position, Chapman continues his quest to find the best ways of reaching food-service workers and consumers.

Go to a restaurant? A supermarket? It’s not like searching for a Holy Grail.

“We have a responsibility to get that information out there,” Chapman said. “The kind of things we’re doing here would have been hard to do in Canada — moving food safety forward.”

That’s what she said.

One way that Chapman has been moving food safety forward is helping agents develop training programs on home food preservation. Once a hallmark of extension programming through tomato clubs for girls, canning and other home food preservation techniques had largely fallen out of favor with consumers in recent years.

Ben Chapman: Defender of the can.

Three-year-old Abigail Hennessey, right, is recovering from an E. coli O157 outbreak in Wales that struck at least four people, including a 32-year-old librarian and new mother who remains in a medically induced coma after suffering kidney damage as a result of the infection.

Abigail’s grandfather, Ronald Hennessey, of Gresford, said that thanks to superb medical treatment from the staff at Alder Hey Children’s Hospital in Liverpool, Abigail was now steadily improving.

“It is great to know she is making excellent progress. Day by day she is getting better and stronger in her recovery.”

Mr Hennessey said the situation was in stark contrast to last week when Abigail fell seriously ill after contracting E.coli.

“Then it was almost as if she was in a kind of trance. She was just staring right ahead. But now she is up talking and laughing. I don’t know when she will be coming home. I would very much like to thank Alder Hey for its tremendous work. They have been magnificent.”

It’s one thing to sicken and kill humans with food like Maple Leaf cold cuts – just don’t mess with people’s pets.

Carrie Pich of Windsor, Ontario, (right, photo from Windsor Star) is convinced her beloved Tigger -- a two-year-old yellow Labrador retriever --  fell ill over the weekend because he ate Maple Leaf hotdogs that might be tainted with bacteria.

"This could have been a human. I mean, (Tigger) is human to us. But it could've happened to you. My husband could've ate two. He loves hotdogs."

Pich said she bought three packages of hotdogs last week: two packs of Maple Leaf Original Wieners and one pack of Shopsy's Deli-Fresh.

Both products are among those listed in the recall.

But Pich didn't know that on the evening of July 31, when she cut up three Maple Leaf Original Wieners to put in Tigger's supper, and gave him one more as a late-night treat.

On Saturday morning, Pich woke to find Tigger vomiting blood.

Dr. Ameer Ebrahim, the owner and veterinarian at Cabana @ Howard Pet Hospital said he can't confirm that Tigger suffered from listeriosis, but the dog's symptoms were "very consistent" with bacterial infection, and he wouldn't rule out a connection with the recalled wieners eaten by Tigger.

"That's a very strong coincidence.”
 

Montreal-native William Shatner – Captain Kirk, Boston Legal dude, Priceline negotiator and spoken-word enthusiast -- has written Canadian Prime Minister Stephen Harper asking that salmon farms be removed from wild-salmon migration routes in the Broughton and Discovery islands area of British Columbia.

Shatner, who filmed an episode of the Boston Legal series in the Broughton Archipelago off northern Vancouver Island, says in his letter that salmon farms are having a disastrous impact on "one of Earth's most precious assets, the wild salmon and steelhead of B.C."

Mary Ellen Walling, executive director, B.C. Salmon Farmers Association, responded that while Shatner’s acting credentials are solid (really?) -- his understanding of fisheries research is less stellar.

Activist groups should, at least, be able to meet the same standards of scrutiny applied to industry. And for journalists who often see themselves as the guardians of the public interest, it seems prudent to be wary of being manipulated, even by those who appear to walk on the side of the public good rather than the side of corporate self-interest. Beam me up, Scotty.

That didn’t go over too well with the locals. Several letter writers pointed out that T.J. Hooker was entitled to his views, didn’t represent industry, and there were lots of ways to do research. Aquaculture folks – facts are important, but are never enough.
 

Eurosurveillance reports today on a March 2008 outbreak of Salmonella Muenster in 25 laboratory confirmed cases in France.

Four patients were admitted to hospital. … S. Muenster was isolated from both cases and the incriminated goat's cheese. …

The place of purchase of the goat's cheese was known for 10 cases: Seven cases had purchased unpasteurised goat's cheese at an agriculture exhibition that was held in Paris from 23 February until 2 March, and three cases had purchased this type of cheese at a local market in south-eastern France….  During the same period, a household cluster of salmonellosis involving three cases was reported through the mandatory notification system. The investigation of this cluster incriminated unpasteurised goat's cheese (consumed on 8 February 2008) as the source of infection. The isolates of these cases were later shown to be positive for S. Muenster.
 

And no I am not talking about Johnny Depp. Time and time again food safety communicators promote the use of digital tip sensitive thermometers to determine doneness of food. But how often is this practice being done in restaurants? If so, is it being done correctly? From my experience, it seems that restaurant operators depend on color far too often and the operators that use thermometers do not use them correctly. This simply boils down to a need of properly train staff. It is imperative that front line food service staff are physically shown how to correctly use thermometers rather than just explaining the concept and theory behind it. Health inspectors, in particular, must take the time during routine inspections to demonstrate the proper usage of thermometers and compel restaurant managers to train their staff accordingly.

There have been too many cases of raw chicken burgers being served to the public and ultimately making people barf.  At times, food service staff are stressed and end up getting food orders wrong and are therefore rushed to correct the problem. In doing so, corners are cut resulting in burgers not being cooked long enough. Take the time to properly cook chicken burgers and remember stick it in.

From cream soup to cancer treatment, I discovered many interesting uses for surplus breast milk after learning that PETA requested Ben & Jerry's use it to replace cow's milk in ice cream products.

"Whatever floats your boat," I said, "as long as it’s pasteurized for the kiddos."

Probably, the most widely-accepted use for extra breast milk is as a supplement for nursing infants whose mothers are unable to produce enough safe breast milk to sufficiently feed them. Several human milk banks exist in the US for this purpose.

One such bank opened this week at the Portland Adventist Medical Center and has a plan in place to ensure the safety of all donations before use.

"We'll do a blood screen on the moms who are going to donate," said Angel Pyles, a lactation nurse. "The milk is pasteurized and rescreened before given to babies who are in need of it."

Young children are one group whose health and well-being are most greatly affected by the culture around them. Those babies are lucky this organization recognizes that even a woman's breast milk has risks that should be controlled.

The idea that food grown and consumed locally is somehow safer than other food, either because it contacts fewer hands or any outbreaks would be contained, is the product of wishful thinking.

Barry Estabrook of Gourmet magazine is the latest to invoke the local is pure fantasy, writing,

“There is no doubt that our food-safety system is broken. But with the vast majority of disease outbreaks coming from industrial-scale operations, legislators should have fixed the problems there instead of targeting small, local businesses that were never part of the problem in the first place.”

As soon as someone says there’s “no doubt” I am filled with doubt about the quality of the statement that is about to follow.

Foodborne illness is vastly underreported -- it's known as the burden of reporting foodborne illness. Someone has to get sick enough to go to a doctor, go to a doctor that is bright enough to order the right test, live in a state that has the known foodborne illnesses as a reportable disease, and then it gets registered by the feds. For every known case of foodborne illness, there are 10 -300 other cases, depending on the severity of the bug.??????

Most foodborne illness is never detected. It’s almost never the last meal someone ate, or whatever other mythologies are out there. A stool sample linked with some epidemiology or food testing is required to make associations with specific foods. ??????Newsweek has an excellent article this week about the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and its Disease Detective Camp, where teenagers learn how to form a hypothesis about a disease outbreak and conduct an investigation. The key lies only partly in state-of-the-art technology. At least half the challenge is figuring out the right questions to ask. Who has contracted the disease? Where have they been? Why were they exposed to this pathogen?

Maybe the vast majority of foodborne outbreaks come from industrial-scale operations because the vast majority of food and meals is consumed from industrial-scale operations. To accurately compare local and other food, a database would have to somehow be constructed so that a comparison of illnesses on a per capita meal or even ingredient basis could be made. ???

 

Whole Foods Market has terrible food safety advice, blames consumers for getting sick, sells raw milk in some stores, and offers up fairytales about organic and natural foods.

The Wall Street Journal reported this morning that Whole Foods chief John Mackey is now going to reposition the Austin, Texas, chain as a champion of healthy living in a return to its natural-foods roots.

"We sell a bunch of junk," he said, vowing to promote healthier lifestyles for its customers and employees. "We've decided if Whole Foods doesn't take a leadership role in educating people about a healthy diet, who the heck is going to do it?"

Given the track record outlined above, almost anybody and any group would be better qualified than Whole Foods. Besides, as soon as someone says they’re going to educate someone else, it’s propaganda rather than compelling, evidence-based information,

I look forward to the whoppers being offered up as educational material in Whole Foods' future.
 

A three-year-old girl who needed dialysis after being caught up in an E coli outbreak is beginning to recover in hospital, her parents said today.

Abigail Hussey suffered kidney failure after eating from a takeaway in Wrexham, north Wales, and is one of two people undergoing hospital treatment after the outbreak last month. Karen Morrisroe-Clutton, a new mother who also had kidney failure, remains in a medically induced coma at Wrexham Maelor hospital. The North East Wales NHS trust said she was in a serious but stable condtion.

She is in Alder Hey Children's hospital in Liverpool, which today released a statement from her mother, Sarah, who also fell ill, and her father, Jeff.

"Abigail's condition deteriorated and she was eventually referred to Wrexham hospital, who transferred her immediately to Alder Hey on Monday 27 July. She tested positive for E coli and was placed on dialysis. We are very relieved that Abigail is beginning to recover, is off dialysis and is eating and drinking quite well."

Sharon Mills, the mother of E. coli victim Mason Jones (left) said the latest Wales outbreak has brought horrific memories flooding back.

“It’s terrible that more people are having to go through this. Mason fought for two weeks until he couldn’t fight any more and ever since I have fought on for him as I don’t want his death to be in vain.”

While the cause of the North Wales outbreak remains under investigation, Mills said she believes both the authorities and the public still fail to fully appreciate the terrible consequences of E.coli infection.

The Llay Fish Bar was allowed to continue business even though environmental health inspectors found poor hygiene conditions and was awarded the lowest rating of no stars during the August 2008 inspection.

Mills said:

“The threat of E.coli is not being taken on board. People really need to start listening and they need to start listening now. The message needs to be drummed home that E.coli is serious and can affect anyone, not just those with underlying health problems. it’s such a powerful bacteria.”
 

About 18 months after the 1993 Jack-in-the-Box E. coli O157:H7 outbreak, I, the erstwhile graduate student, gave a talk to a bunch of food safety types from government and industry. I showed a clip from ABC’s 20/20 television program about a family fighting for regulatory change, and many in the audience laughed at the family when their kitchen was shown. Audience members commented that the consumers were sloppy in their cooking and of course they got sick, and if only they would cook hamburger properly E. coli O157:H7 wouldn’t happen.

I thought the response of the audience was sort of appalling.

In mid-1994, Michael Taylor was appointed chief of USDA's Food Safety and Inspection Service.  On Sept. 29, 1994, USDA said it would now regard E. coli O157:H7 in raw ground beef as an “adulterant,” a substance that should not be present in the product. By mid-October, 1994, Taylor announced plans to launch a nationwide sampling of ground beef to assess how much E. coli O157:H7 was in the marketplace. The 5,000 samples would be taken during the year from supermarkets and meat processing plants “to set an example and stimulate companies to put in preventive measures.” Positive samples would prompt product recalls of the entire affected lot, effectively removing it from any possibility of sale.

That's the long-winded version for what a USDA official said in a 1994 television interview: we'll stop blaming consumers  when they get sick from the food and water they consume.

But the just-cook-it crowd persisted. And still does today.

A couple of weeks ago, while announcing a ground beef recall in Colorado, the U.S. Department of Agriculture’s Food Safety Inspection Service stated in a release,

FSIS would like to remind consumers of the importance of following food safety guidelines when handling and preparing raw meat. Ground beef should be cooked to a safe minimum internal temperature of 160° Fahrenheit.

I would like to remind FSIS that it ain’t so easy to handle contaminated ground beef and not spread it around a home or food service kitchen.

Jim Marsden, a former vp at the American Meat Institute and now a professor at Kansas State University, wrote in his meatingplace.com blog last week, the top-10 reasons “just cook it” does not, and will not, work.

1. E. coli O157:H7 is a unique pathogen. The levels of this organism necessary to cause infection are very low.

2. The severity of the disease E. coli O157:H7 can cause, especially in children is devastating.

3. In many cases, parents order hamburgers for their children and rely on restaurants to cook them properly.  In restaurants, parents really have no control over whether the hamburgers they order are sufficiently cooked to eliminate possible contamination from E. coli O157:H7.

4. If consumers unknowingly bring this pathogen into their kitchens, it is almost impossible to avoid cross contamination. Even the smallest amount of contamination on a food that is not cooked can cause illness. Many of the reported cases of E. coli O157:H7 have involved ground beef that was clearly cooked at times and temperatures sufficient to inactivate E. coli O157:H7.  Some other vector, i.e. cross contamination was probably involved.

5. Even if consumers attempt to use thermometers to measure cooking temperature, it is difficult to properly measure the internal temperature of hamburger patties. They would have to use an accurate thermometer and place the probe exactly into the center of the patty. In addition, the inactivation of E. coli O157:H7 is dependent on cooking time and temperature. For example, if they cook to 155 degrees F, they should hold that temperature for 16 seconds. It is not realistic to expect that consumers, many of which are children will scientifically measure the internal temperature of hamburgers.

6. The way ground beef is packaged, it is virtually impossible to remove it from packages or chubs and make patties without spreading contamination if it is present.

7. Sometimes ground beef appears to be cooked when it really isn’t. There is a phenomenon called “premature browning” that can make ground beef appear to be fully cooked when in fact it is undercooked.

8. E. coli O157:H7 may be present in beef products other than ground beef. For example, in non-intact beef products, including tenderized steaks that are not always cooked to temperatures required for inactivation.

9. There have been many cases and outbreaks of E. coli O157:H7 associated with foods that are not cooked (i.e. fresh cut produce).

10. As Senator Patrick Leahy said after the 1993 Jack-in-the-Box outbreak – “The death penalty is too strong a punishment for undercooking a hamburger”.  He was right –consumers will make mistakes. There needs to be a margin of safety so that undercooking does not result in disease or death.

Early on in the Aug. 2008 outbreak of listeria that killed 22 Canadians, the manufacturer, Maple Leaf Foods, adopted the line that, listeria is everywhere.

CEO Micheal McCain said,

“All food plants and supermarkets have some amount of listeria.”

Yesterday, when Maple Leaf announced yet another recall of product – this time involving nine wiener products produced under the Hygrade, Shopsy's and Maple Leaf brands produced at its plant in Hamilton, Ontario – the listeria is everywhere line was … everywhere.

Randy Huffman of Maple Leaf said in the company blog yesterday,

“Listeria is a common bacteria – it can be in virtually 100% of refrigerated food plants. It also exists at low levels in one out of every 200 ready-to-eat food products and even higher levels in many other foods we eat …

“This creates a real dilemma for us. I have to be frank with you. Nothing we can do – nothing anyone can do – will completely eliminate Listeria from the food supply. Listeria is found in about 0.5% of ready-to-eat meat and poultry products based upon best estimates from the USDA. This percentage means that one out of every 200 packages is likely to be positive. I know consumers might prefer that this number was zero, and food safety professionals certainly strive for this goal.”

I thought you were Randy, but if you’d rather be frank, sure. And this is a Canadian recall, you may want to explain what USDA is.

Both Huffman and Mansel Griffiths, professor in the food science department at the University of Guelph, invoked the consumer-wants-zero-risk although I’ve seen no evidence to back up this straw-person argument. Griffiths said,
 
“There's no such thing as 100-per-cent safe foods, no matter what food we eat.”

No one asked for risk-free food; but consumers do expect that those in charge of whatever portion of the farm-to-fork food safety system take responsibility for their own actions. Me, I told the Toronto Star the risk is that the listeria contamination could have happened after processing, and people, especially kids, eat wieners out of the fridge without reheating.

Back to the issue: if listeria is everywhere, what should processors and retailers do about it?

• Warning labels. Pregnant women and other at-risk populations should be informed of listeria risks, using a variety of messages and a variety of media. The supermarket Publix places all of its deli-cut meats into a plastic bag that says:

“The Publix Deli is committed to the highest quality fresh cold cuts & cheeses???

Therefore we recommend all cold cuts are best if used within three days of purchase???

And all cheese items are best if used within four days of purchase”

• Make listeria testing data public.

• Market food safety efforts at retail.

Because listeria is everywhere.
 

The BBC reports that Llay Fish Bar in Wrexham, suspected as the source of an E. coli O157 outbreak that has left a new mother on life-support and a 3-year-old with renal failure, received zero out of five in a 2008 hygiene inspection.

The Llay Fish Bar has been closed by local council -- but only since the severe illnesses emerged.

Food such as takeout or takeaway, that is initially prepared in a restaurant but is consumed in an individual’s home, may be a venue to target with safe-food handling messages. Earlier this decade, both Chicago-based Francesca Restaurants and Boston-based Buca Di Beppo Restaurants reported anecdotal success placing food safety labels on containers of takeout food.

In 2004, my group undertook research to:

• examine restaurant managements’ experience of using a safe food-handling label on takeout food;
• explore managements’ food safety concerns;
• determine the value of consumer safe-food handling labels to managers;
• establish perceived label effectiveness; and,
• identify challenges with implementation.

For our study, we defined take-out as food procured from a casual dining restaurant (i.e. sit-down restaurant) but eaten elsewhere, including food ordered as take-out and leftover food packaged to be taken home. The label we developed is right (above) and left (note, the phone line and web site don’t work anymore).

The research paper describing that work has been accepted by a peer-reviewed scientific journal and will be published in the near future.

However, the public health types in Dubai discovered over the weekend the same thing we found: most consumers and restaurateurs like the idea.

Our bites.ksu.edu Dubai correspondent contacted Ben and me about stickers on takeaway, and we sent along what we had developed. Today, the Khaleej Times reports,

The Dubai Municipality is planning to encourage all restaurants in the emirate to issue advisories to consumers on safe handling of takeaway food.

The decision follows a similar initiative by a popular south Indian restaurant group that attaches red stickers to its takeaway bags at its two outlets in Dubai. A municipality official applauded the group’s move and said the civic body intended to support such initiatives by other restaurants as well.

Director of Food Control Department, Khalid Mohammed Sherif, told the Khaleej Times,

“We are encouraging more and more food outlets to put such messages along with takeaway food to ensure that the customer handles the food properly. We will be providing all of them with modified instructions for customers to handle food taken away.”

He said the modified versions of the advisories will include the temperature at which food items have to be stored and the duration within which they have to be consumed, depending on the types of ingredients.

Below is a draft of the information intended for consumers.

Amy, Sorenne and I are hanging out in Venice, Florida, and I do most of the cooking. Lots of fresh fruits and veggies from the neighborly Publix supermarket, and I even bought a digital, tip-sensitive meat thermometer from Target because I just feel naked cooking without one.

Others aren’t so fortunate, I guess.

A group called HolidayTravelWatch, somewhere in the European Union, has just published its top-20 appalling holiday complaints and problems. Included in this year’s list:

1. Family holiday to Egypt where a child was struck down by severe food poisoning, hospitalization and subsequent scalding in the hotel restaurant.

2. Family holiday to Turkey found that most of their group were ill, they were diagnosed as suffering with Salmonella and Cryptosporidium.

12. One family reported that they had returned from Turkey and their daughter had been diagnosed with Salmonella - they report that many people were ill at the hotel.

15. Holidaymakers to one hotel in Egypt reported sewage smells on the complex, gardens irrigated by stagnant water, food lukewarm, drinks served through a hatch and not via sealed bottles - they suffered severe gastric illness which still continues.

17. One family to Egypt suffered with food undercooked, poor chef hygiene practices (one chef was seen to handle bloody meat then touch other food), flies on the food in the pool bar, sewage smells in bathroom, cracks on the balcony and they are suspected as suffering with Cryptosporidium.

20, One couple’s trip to Egypt was marred by building work, diarrhoea on the public toilet walls, diarrhoea in the restaurant. They both suffered severe illness and weight loss - they are still ill.

This will be brief because I have to cook dinner (another week in Venice, Florida, and supper will be permanently moved to 3:30 pm).

With the upcoming release of Julia and Julie, food pornographers everywhere are reminiscing about their love of Julia Child, widely credited with bringing French cooking to mainstream America.

Michael Pollan takes 8,272 words in tomorrow’s N.Y. Times magazine to say The Food Network appeals to eaters not cooks, that people wouldn’t be so fat if they had to make food with basic ingredients at home, and he’s nostalgic for his mother’s cooking.

Salon magazine has already driven a few trucks through the rather gaping holes in Pollan’s arguments and cherry-picked supporting evidence. About word 745, I recognized Pollan’s hypocrisy and wondered why I was reading this trash when I could be cooking?

And Dan Ackroyd at least deserves a cameo in the new movie for best Julia Child impersonation (although John Candy’s Julia on Second City TV, duking it out with Mr. Rogers in a boxing match during a satirical Battle of the PBS stars is a close second).